How I dress comfortably without looking like a schlub

Hawthorne at home

If there is one facet of life where I truly excel, it’s lounging in style. I know lounging. Hell, I even have my own line of silk robes (that reminds me, need to make more). Being comfortable at home while not looking and feeling like a complete schlub is a delicate dance, but I’ve learned a few moves.

Why should you give a shit how you look in the privacy of your own home? Because it’s an easy win - an uncomplicated way to feel good about yourself. And in the immortal words of the late Karl Lagerfeld: “Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life so you bought some sweatpants.” I’m not talking about dystopian looksmaxxing here, and I don’t wanna get self-helpy either, but the simple action of making an effort (a minimal one!) to put a good foot forward every day can have a dramatic effect on your spirit and sense of self-worth. I promise you - you can still be extremely comfortable without sweatpants and a hoodie, and once you get your staple pieces in order, it’s just as easy.

A quick scroll through my numerous saved outfit inspiration photos revealed shockingly few casual options (like none). I think this is partly due to daily driver chill-wear being less exciting, but mostly it’s because us men really don’t know what to wear. It's worth noting that womenswear has a whole sub-industry dedicated to "self-care" at home, where the options for lounging and looking good are actually good. The options marketed to men mostly include uninspired iterations of hoodies and joggers with little to no emphasis on style. Women are expected to put in a Herculean amount of effort (and money) into this realm, while men are generally applauded for not walking around in dirty boxers.

This is a subject I hope to explore more within this arena, but for now let’s start with some basic building blocks. I’m very much still figuring this shit out myself. It’s surprisingly difficult, and part of wanting to write about it is to help me organize my own thoughts on the matter. I think the easiest way to go about it is to show you by example, so here’s how I like to dress when I’m just hanging at the house, or running to Trader Joe’s, or dropping my toddler off at day care.

(left) trousers are The Row via The RealReal, (right) trousers are Paul Smith lol I obviously love the Chateau Marmont tee

First up is a pair of trousers with an elastic waist (drawstring optional). Leandra calls them apartment pants. Again, so many options for women, much fewer for men. I’m still on the hunt for the perfect pair - the ideal combo is lightweight wool/cotton, a looser fit, crease/pintuck down the front, zip side pockets, bottom cuff (looks nicer with sneakers). Any brands that wanna design some with me holler :). Here are a few solid options I found from Hawes & Curtis, Reiss, NN07 and a less expensive dupe from H&M that is actually pretty fire. Layer with a nice t-shirt (not the freebie swag one from the weed dispensary) or solid plain tank and a long sleeve button up, shacket or denim shirt like this one from Husbands or this classic one from Lee. Extra credit for something fun like this or this. Keep the outer layer cropped - if the length is too long it tends to look sloppy.

Slippers are a must. I’ve been loving these velvet ones from Vibivenezia. I have them in chocolate brown as well. When my wife and I were in Italy for our honeymoon, every chic local Italian man was wearing them. Full disclosure, I almost bought these Uggs last week and after looking again I still think they’re cool. If you’re a professional athlete or still in high school, by all means, rock the rubber Adidas/Nike slides… if not, it’s time to step it up.

The robe is an advanced move, but one I strongly support. My grandma Shirley wore one every day of her life. I got this tiger print one from a vendor at Rose Bowl flea market who makes them new. This vintage one from Christian Dior Monsieur is amazing. So is this one and this one. I love to rock a silk robe when I’m doing my Wine & Vinyl Hour livestream or just having a glass after my toddler goes to bed. I will admit they are not ultra practical if you are trying to get work done, but you feel like a boss. If you’re not ready for a 1950s Hollywood leading man style silk number, the terry robe is a more accessible option.

You can do it. I believe in you. Be the well dressed version of yourself, even when you’re chillin’ at home alone, and I promise you, your quality of life will improve. Upgrade a few simple pieces and this will all become second nature. Please let me know how absurd you think all of this is in the comments. I also want to know who your loungewear style icons are and who I should check out on Substack or elsewhere.

Peace and love,